Judith Mena Gómez
Mirrors are real but not real.
6:59 a.m., all you can hear is silence. 7:00 a.m., the alarm rings to wake me up every single morning. It is just like a battle against all this laziness. Hard to get up and turn that alarm off. It is so hard to open my eyes, all I want is to sleep more and more.
I get up and slowly walk to the closet. I open the closet door and the alarm sounds louder. I walk inside the closet and stretch up, trying to reach that nice digital alarm clock that is on the top of the shelf. I press the red OFF button and finally I am awake.
I walk to the bathroom and wonder to myself how I am going to go to the kitchen and walk next to that mirror that scares me every single morning. Every day after my shower, it is an achievement to get that fresh coffee that is waiting for me in the kitchen.
Finally ready, smelling good and wearing my new pair of jeans and my favorite white shirt, I open my bedroom door and walk slowly onto the cold floor with no shoes on. I try to get closer to that dark kitchen without looking to the wall because I am afraid of seeing that mirror again.
Walking in the dark and looking down, I pass the mirror and hear someone saying, “I hate you.” My legs start to tremble and goose bumps erupt all over my body. I can see how even the hair on my arms get scared. I walk faster to reach the light switch. When I turn it on, I look at the mirror and I see this shadow behind me.
My face turns white, my words disappear, I am frozen, can’t talk, can’t think, what should I do? I am so scared. I can’t even ask for help, no one lives with me. I turn back and see no one behind me.
Afraid to look at the mirror again, I look and see again this big shadow getting closer to me. I turn around but see nothing, turn again and see this shadow getting closer and closer. I freak out, speechless. Putting my legs down firmly and taking a deep breath, I work up the courage and ask, “Who is this? What do you want from me? Why are you trying to scare me every morning?” The shadow keeps coming closer and closer saying “I hate you.” My eyes can’t believe what I am seeing. My hands and legs are shaking, I am sweating but my hands are cold; I ask again, “What do you want?”
In that moment I see a bright light. With my eyes wide open I step back and say, “Who is this?” And the shadow responds, “I hate you.” The shadow keeps getting closer and closer and I am afraid it will hurt me. The shadow finally is clear, I cannot believe what I am seeing. It is my face, my body, my smile, it is me but with a horrible look. I look angry and my eyes are red and I keep saying, “I hate you.”
My face in that mirror is different, it is just not me. The person that was in that mirror is angry, with those evil red eyes and red skin. My voice is different, just like an old man’s. I cannot believe how horrible I am.
I move my hand to try to reach the mirror, but I realize that the other me is moving exactly the same as me. I move my left arm and the shadow of me moves its left arm. I move my head and the shadow moves its head too.
7:00 a.m., the alarm rings. I open my eyes and notice I am in my bed. I take a deep breath and realize it was just a dream. I get up and go to the closet to turn the alarm off. Alarm silenced and I walk slowly to the kitchen to look into that evil mirror. When I step in front of the mirror I realize it is me and just me. I look to my eyes and see what I dreamed. I realize that the evil is the same evil that comes out when I get angry, that is the same evil that other people can see and can hurt them. That is the horrible me, the one that I sometimes bring out and hurt others.
I look at myself in the mirror and a tear rolls down from my eyes.